i'll bet nobody reading this can say that they've ever intentionally rode over a supervisor on a mountain bike and didn't even get in trouble. well, i have. and i can only think of one situation where this is possible. the one i was in.
for my 15th summer, i got the pleasure of being sent, along with my friend's Left and Self, on a mountain biking tour of colorado. it was an insane trip of daring stunts, beautiful mountain trails, and broken bones. it was kicked off at bike tour headquarters in new hampshire, where Left, in an attempt to show some girls how awesome he was. decided to suddenly try those peg handles that get put into holes while you hang from them and slowly walk your way across the room using the holes as peg anchors. it was set up as kind of a physical trial that takes a lot of strength and most importantly BALANCE. Left jumped up and grabbed them, not paying any attention to how close he was to a table of expensive bike equipment. he had a strong start. his jump to grab the pegs in the first two holes was successful, but as soon as he pulled the first peg out of the hole, his weight naturally swung in the direction of the removed peg and his over sized Doc Martin boots flailed out wildly, kicking not only the supervisor in the face, but then coming down hard on the table of equipment sending it all flying across the room. needless to say, those girls were NOT impressed.
anyways, by the fourth week, we were all very in shape and very good at trail riding. good enough to get entered into a NORBA (national outdoor rider's bike association) race near Este's Park. we were all given a lecture by our most annoying and not too intelligent leader. he was that semi-hippy guy who thought that "pow wow's" and consensus governing were ideal, only he hadn't anticipated 3 youths from nyc who quickly outsmarted him in his own games. we actually convinced him it was okay for us to bully people as long as we bullied each other too. all because it was "fair".
well, as we got into the crowd of riders at the start line, our leader Russell, turned to us and said that we shouldn't be too aggressive or push anybody because these guys didn't play nice. plus, he mentioned, that the craziness of the start, what with 200 riders right next to each other jockeying for good positioning on a thin windy trail, would definitely make for disastrous domino effect crashes. we all nodded to him. and actually, i think i was even going to take his advice. looking around me, these guys were all full grown mountain men and i didn't really want to learn first hand what Russell was talking about.
before any of us expected, the gun went off. immediately, Russell turned into a raving psychopath. clearly, he was not practicing what he just preached. the man was on a mission for first place, and was already ahead of us by 10 feet before my feet were even in their straps. within two seconds Russell was clearly grabbing the guy next to him by the handle bar. what happened next was just absolutely astonishing. our fearless leader got punched right in the kisser. it was a really good punch too. it took him right off his bike and flattened him out, right in front of us, his loyal team. heh heh. i hated that guy, so did the other guys behind me. i can't speak for the others in our group, but i can say, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that i could have avoided him. there was enough room to the right for me to veer. but i knew instantly, that if i didn't...well that would be okay too. so, all the annoying things he had done to us, all the punishments he had dolled out, all the lectures he had so righteously directed at us, well they were enough for me to just pull up on the handles so my front tire would mostly clear him and i could then bike over him with my back tire and not crash. that's what i did. that's also what everybody did behind me too. Russell proved his own point, and gave us each the opportunity to help him do so. the bump to my back was surprisingly soft and satisfying. like hitting a pillow . didn't hurt or slow me down at all. he also looked up at me as i went over him. his expression was definitely surprise with noticeable angst.
I came in 5th on that race. Russell didn't finish. he never even brought it up.
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